It’s been six months. I know I have been busy and haven’t written in forever, but I haven’t forgotten. I’m still looking for you – I thought I saw you in a butterfly, but I’m just not sure. I’m not sure about a lot of things these days.
Please do me a favor and watch over us. Christmas was always YOUR holiday. The missing you sometimes hides behind the craziness of the day, but it’s always there – a constant ache. It’s stronger now with Christmas coming. I really wish you were here. We all do.
There’s so much I want to say. To ask. To know. There are so many times I feel the urge to pick up the phone and call you. I think of all the people in the world missing someone the way I miss you. I’m sure I can figure this out. But right now I just feel like that statue of Atlas – carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders. My mind is overflowing. My lungs and heart heavy. Sleep brings some peace, but only when it’s not filled with crazy dreams I can never recollect.
I miss you. I’m trying really hard to be strong. If you have a chance, please send me a sign for Christmas. I could really use it.